Did you expect this to feel so very BIG?

Dear Mummy, 

Did you expect this to feel so very BIG? 

The excitement of a beautifully decorated nursery, and an immaculate bassinet waiting to be used. 

All of that can somehow feel irrelevant, foolish, naive, when you are gazing at your newborn baby, swimming in a newborn zippy that is way too big for those tiny arms and legs. 

On the first day home from the hospital you are finally alone as a new family. The silence is deafening. You start to wonder what now….. Do I wake the baby to feed? Will she wake herself? should I sleep? or eat? or shower?……. Or CRY???

Thoughts run through your mind how the hell did the hospital let us leave with this baby?… You can barely keep your house plants alive…..

Yesterday you were yourself… today you are suddenly Mummy, with all of the responsibility and expectations that come along with such a title. You have the weight of this life on your shoulders, and in your already sore breasts.

How can you love someone you hardly know???? 

So small, with such basic needs. How can something so small feel so very enormous??

Take a breath, you’re not alone…..